The Female of the Species ...

... is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more deadlier than the male.
Oh yes-siree it's true.
I just know it as I continue to age oh-so-disgracefully.

You can't see it, you can't touch it and you can't always feel it in your heart.

But let me tell you, a woman's invincibility is always waiting, ready to pounce.

So when things get dangerous, your super powers are restored and ready to go.

I have fought many baddies with my bare heart.

And next month I will celebrate 44 years of kicking arse and fighting farce.

 It doesn't matter if you're a blond, a brunette or a redhead.

 But it helps to have fellow female deadly assassins on your side...

 ... plus some fighting flares and a killer vinyl jacket.

You are a female with a deadly-huge heart and soul who must trust her instincts and sniff out the rotten apples.
But treasure the sweet and true.
Listen to mama talking here.

Amen sister.

1970s vinyl snake-skin jacket and shoe earrings - been in my wardrobe for 20 years.

1970s navy pin-striped flares - eBay

Swimsuit - Black Milk

Shoes - Camberwell Market, Melbourne

I admit I'm not so invincible when it comes to changing the parental controls on my laptop from settings for a nine-year-old.

That's why I haven't been over to see you for a chat.

But I still love ya's!!!

Baci, Desiree xo

Sometimes I'd Like to Cut Your Head Off Just to See the Look on Your Face

I'm feeling very queen-like today.
Well, from the waist up.
Cardi, three-string pearls, silly hat, fluffy hair, dopey-looking face, oh and granny bag ... it's all there.
Except I think the last queen to show off her rack so disgracefully may have been Marie Antoinette or Elizabeth I.

I threw this on to dash out and pick up The Stylist after her sleepover.
It started with the leggings and then things kind of went from there in the following four minutes I had to get ready.

Off to the library to shatter any delicate nerves that may have been lurking in the bookshelves, but no, I think everyone ran away because I scared them off.
At least I got to the head of the queue in a jiffy.

Then off for coffee and a milkshake with the wee hen, who jumped at the chance to snap off rather a lot of pics - "Mum, EVERYONE is staring at you."

Say hello to my rack.
I love a bit of hook-and-eye wickedness.

This is the first time this darling Vivienne Westwood cotton corset has been out to play.
She's been hanging around waiting patiently and today she finally had her glorious debut.
I was worried about popping out of it, but the nert-pipples behaved and stayed well put.

Vivienne Westwood corset - eBay

Leather cut-offs - Bitching and Junkfood
Leggings - Black Milk

Cardigan - Camberwell flea market, Melbourne

Necklace, earrings and bag - thrifted

Hat - Etsy

Shoes - F21

This outfit makes me feel half-Queenie, half-Edmund Blackadder.

Gosh, I'm full of good ideas today!

Baci, Desiree xo

Oh-Rah-Rah-Rah Darling!

"Do you think about dresses and hats all the time even in church?" - Love in a Cold Climate

I couldn't have said it better myself.
Thanks to the screen adaption of Nancy Mitford's book I decided a post inspired after watching Love in a Cold Climate yesterday, most necessary.
It really should be sweltering hot here in Brisneyland, instead we have stormy grey weather which means indoor pics with pathetic lighting.

But it also means vintage evening gowns, knickers and furs!!! Woo-hoo!

And of course, it's Frock on a Friday.
I practised using hot sticks in my hair again today ... still getting there, but I think the result is looking a bit closer to a soft 1930s curl, which is what I'm after.

This darling hand-made salmon-pink evening gown was a bargain-ous $30.
I think the frock is late-1930s to early-1940s.
All the sequinned geometric shapes have been hand-sewn and the frock has a peplum feature.
I go wobbly at the knees for a peplum.

That's for the squally weather which will just totally ruin my hair darlink!

Can you guess what's in my hair?
Mice of course!!!
These are the pretty mink mice sweater clips the divine Claire gifted me.
I'm very happy to have mice, real or fake, having their way in my locks!!

Oooh can't go without a knicker shot.
I'm building up quite a collection of vintage slips and knickers.
Yes I wear other people's old undies ... disgraceful isn't it?
These are 1930s button-up rayon and lace knickers - you really don't want to be in a hurry for the loo ... think about it.

Gown and knickers - eBay

Fur stole, 1930s leather clutch and bangles - thrifted

1930s art deco earrings - Etsy

Sweater clips and necklace - beautiful Claire

Blue fishnet stockings and garter belt - Sock Dreams

Melissa Amazonias - Melissa Australia (on sale!)

Which items of vintage clothing are you obsessed with today?

Back to Life

After a weekend spent in bed with a man-cold (yes I get man-colds) I seemed to bounce back yesterday.
I'd say I was about 80% better here.
Better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick eh?

To aid to the illusion I was feeling way better than my body was telling me, I decided to wear a headband that had been taunting me for four days.
It's one The Stylist made using little yellow roses, but it just wasn't "working" so she gave it to me to sort out.
I added these giant red flowers and plenty of greenery.

It's officially my biggest headband to date and I think I need more.
The other thing about recovering from a man-cold is I really didn't feel like wearing any make up so I just slapped on red lipstick ... not even mascara, which is unheard of!
Red lippie is THE way to make me feel half-human.

I fight back those nasty bugs with plenty of rings and bangles and of course this fabulous white bag!

Somebody's getting a parcel - hehe!

But I just had to make sure it went in the mailbox ... fly away my precious, fly away!

Now, sit back and wait for delicious fish and chips to take home for dinner ... every mouthful a scrumptious taste of heaven!
The perfect solution to satiating a returning appetite:)).

This little outing demanded minimal effort so I wore:

DIY headband

Swimsuit: Black Milk

1970s silver lame maxi: gifted by beautiful Vix

Silver lace-ups: ASOS

Earrings, bangles and rings:  thrifted and Etsy

Bag and leather bangle: Christmas swap gift from scrumptious Erica Louise (you can see what I sent her here)

Pic inspirations: All by The Stylist

Let's fill that rumbling tum and get back to dancing and reality!
Baci,
Desiree xo

Robot At The Silent Disco

After The Stylist spent the other night draping 100m of blue fairy lights around the house, I've decided to call her work of art, Silent Disco.
The Phoenix stumbled into the kitchen at 2am and exclaimed "they're fluro, everything's glowing!"

I think the lights go really well with my new "robot" pants (named by my styling team here).
Maybe I could do a Marchesa Luisa Casati, wrap myself in lights and go partying!
Note The Stylist's touch of her daisy headband on the tree - hehe!

When you're nine, you need to twirl.
A lot.
And it's better with a flashing Santa hat.

These pics were taken a few nights ago by The Stylist after I curled my hair.
I loved this outfit so much, I wore it the following day with a huge floral headband instead of the top hat.
I had two incidents of women leaving their shops to chase me down the street and compliment my very shiny outfit.
And there was this darling old lady talking to herself while walking down the street who interrupted the conversation she was having with herself to say "oh goodness those are nice pants".
I hope I talk to myself in a very loud voice in public when I'm an "old lady".
That way I can share my disgrace with the world.
Now that's love.

Men's vintage top hat: De Mille Vintage, Melbourne

1970s lurex tunic: opshopped

Silver leggings: Black Milk

Shoes: F21 (on sale)

Earrings: craft stall

Rings: Etsy and a shop in Melbourne

Remember this guy?

He's the really cool robot, T-1000 from Terminator 2 who did some really bad shit.

So yeah, I kind of feel like running like him - he is a robot-thingy after all.

No that's just way too exhausting.
Time for something more relaxing.
I bought a gorgeous baby mouse for The Stylist - she's so cute, I want to just keep her in my pocket.
I discovered that she fits perfectly in the cups of my bright purple chola slut bra, which I'm ashamed to say I haven't photographed yet for that amazing slattern, La Dama.

I'm happy to say the wee mouse loves playing in big headbands too.



What's hiding in my headband? from Desiree on Vimeo.

Hope you're all having a jolly fine Sunday!

Desiree xo