Monday, March 3, 2014

The Growing Pains of Sybil

Meet Sour-Puss Sybil.
She's looking rather lovely in her best frock and pearls.
A rosy glow to her fair cheeks, a dab of lipstick, but not too much, Mother won't allow it.
Not after the fruit punch incident at the Fair Maiden's Ball last spring.
Aunt Bea said it was a disgraceful start to the season and now Father won't let Sybil out unchaperoned.

She has a full year to wait before she comes of age and her trust allowance starts, meanwhile, she has a good-sized chip on her shoulder the size of that on her portrait frame.
She never had good aim and pewter candlesticks are not as hard as silver.
Drat her brother's poker losing streak.

So poor Sour-Puss Sybil has been sent to stay with Aunt Dotty at the seaside.
Aunt Dotty is the only relative who would take on Sybil and now it's clear to the young lady why.

Aunt Dotty refuses to let her grey hair show, instead dyeing her hair platinum blond.
Scandalous for an ageing crone of 46.
She insists her under garments are too pretty to hide beneath frocks and she boldly wears her slips in public without a care.
She sways between humour and oblivion to the stares and whispers when she steps out with her pretty, yet silly, niece on her arm.

Aunt Bea can barely utter her younger sister's name without having a coughing fit and she's carefully cut Aunt Dotty's photographs out of the family album.
There's talk of a man, but no-one's seen him and it's said she wears his image on her ears.
If he's as handsome and wicked as he looks in the photograph, it's no wonder she's keeping him all to herself.

Finally, there's the bare legs in summer with purple toenails if you please!
Sybil can barely contain herself from asking her Aunt why she wears wings on her strange shoes and a woman in her 40s should at least be wearing a slip and stockings.
But Aunt Dotty insists she IS wearing a slip and one day women young and old will swap the silly stockings for artificial tanning to disguise evidence of summertime bites.
Meanwhile, Sour-Puss Sybil, who was once adamant that Pongo's parties were "simply the thing", spends most of her evenings these days with a furrowed brow, awaiting whatever evening's entertainment her Aunt will produce.
What will it be?  A seance?  A late-night trawl of dubious nightspots?  Cake for supper?  Knife-throwing or dance lessons?
Perhaps in time, Sybil's scowl will disappear.  Time will tell.


  1. I LOVE THE CROWN!!! the earrings are beautiful . . . and the wings on shoes are amazing!!!! *______*

  2. You're such a storyteller, we need a book! I love that we've become the women we were warned about with garish make-up and funny shoes.
    Sour-Puss Sybil needs to take a leaf out of Aunt Dotty's book, this gimlet eyes and the set of her chin are enough to turn the milk sour! xxxx

  3. Loved this whole story, it was marvellous. The flower crown is gorgeous and you look wonderful xx

  4. Aww, I think Sybil's rather gorgeous! I know what it's like to have a Fuck Off Resting Face, I can be feeling perfectly chipper but look like a sour puss. Still, a stay with Aunt Dotty will sort her out, she'll be showing her Black Bottom before the week's out. The fruit punch incident shows she has it in her!
    Loving your gorgeous flimsies, and the amazing dancing in the clip! xxx

  5. Brilliant, can't wait for part 2!!!!

  6. Poor Sybil. I'm sure she will thrive with her Aunt! Isn't it a shame that modern dance clubs don't leave room to dance like that anymore?

  7. Sybil has naughty eyes and a lot to live up to :) I think her Aunty D should bring on the dancing lessons .... and who knows it might just be pearls and a blouse upstairs and flouncy tap drawers and rolled down stockings downstairs LMAO

    Go Sybil!!

    p.s. I love her so much :)

  8. I wanna hang with Sybil and Aunt Dotty! Those chicks know where it's at!!!
    I love Sybil's story, she's a gal after my own heart but twice as pretty, despite the sour expression-or is that disdain?!
    Vix' comment is very apt; I've eben saying for years that I am the woman parents warn their children about! We all are!! HUZZAH! Rather that than be a cold, boring sow.
    Love and Lustipops!

  9. You Brits who blog will know who sang this ditty:

    "Oh,we never speak of Aunt Letty,
    Her picture is turned to the wall.
    "'Tho she lives on the French Riviera,
    Mama says she is dead to us all."

    I'll wager Aunt Dotty knows the rest of the lyrics!

  10. We ALL need an Aunt Dotty! Especially those of us with pickle pusses. Love your hair and your flower crown and your make-up and your shoes and oh.....I just love the whole Desiree package!

  11. Go Aunt Dotty!!! Thumbs down to Aunt Bea for cutting Dotty out of the pictures, biatch!!

  12. I love this :D
    What a funny narrative. Love the underwear turned outerwear slips

  13. you look very beautiful and wise in the close up pictures... xxx

  14. mwahahah love your cute funny sassiness!!, love your flapper style!!, and obviously Love Your Fabulousness!!
    besos & belleza

  15. So happy Sybil got to stay with Aunt Dotty! I loved this and I always think a Dotty in the family is essential (my Father-in-Law was Grandad Dotty, can a man be too awesome!)I just love what you are wearing, you look gorgeous! x x x

  16. Can I come and stay with Aunt Dotty by the seaside? Please?

    The blonde looks lovely, as do you, in your inner-outer things :)

  17. I'll gladly take Sybil's place! That Aunt Dotty sounds like a really groovy gal :D


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