Thursday, November 15, 2012

All Fur Coat and No Knickers

Throughout my few years with The Phoenix, who spent a couple of decades living in Yorkshire, I'm often found doubled over at the bawdy, pant-wetting slang he enjoys crafting into his vocabulary especially for me.
One of my favourites has to be my post title, which describes a woman who looks elegant but is a bit of a "sleaze".
My favourite kinda gal.
When I relate to him tales of my London years, he usually manages to somehow work in "those shandy-drinkin' southern wankers" into an otherwise polite response.
Don't bother getting your "baps" in a twist my southern beauties, gettin' "mardy" is about as "useful as a chocolate teapot".
Ooh he can be a "reight coin" that one.


We're all here for one reason and that's to have a perve at some nice clobber innit?
The feather stole is the final treasure in the parcel of joy from Terri of Rags Against the Machine.
A rich purple colour, I'm simply stunned at that glorious woman's eye at frocking up a wannabe circus bint.


Forest City Fashionista introduced me to the Ontario-based crafty beaders, Create Beautiful Beads, who custom-made me this pair of humungous Johnny Cash earrings.
Ooh he's smokin' baby!


 Let's see if this puts some lead in your pencil.


Headband - made by me
Pearl collar - flea market
1930s silk nightie - Etsy
Shoes - thrifted


"Fookin' 'ell I've got a reight lob-on luv".


Speaking of lob-on's, I got a large one when a parcel from the super-gorgeous Helga von Trollop arrived today.
Among the pant-worthy goodies were this necklace and earrings.
Oh but you were looking at the tart in the vintage frilly knickers and pink nightie though weren't you?
Yep, those were the first items I tried on.
More deliciousness in another post.
Thank you darling Terri and Helga!
Classy.
Top-shelf.
All the way baby!
Arse-squeezes all round darlinks.
Desiree xo

39 comments:

edie pop said...

WOW WONDERFUL!!That purple stole is so vibrant and awesome, I really don't know where to start, I adore everything here!Jhonny Cash is always in my heart and those earrings will be on my Christmas wish list, I love that you matched them to your glorious headband, you create a sophisticate yet modern interpretation of the golden Hollywood era!!The white silk nightie and the silver shoes are amazing too!Great knickers tribute photoshoot and the pink dress-nightie is lovely too!
Love and molti baci!
xxxx

pastcaring said...

Hahaha, how brilliant to "hear" some South Yorkshire dialect coming from you, Desiree! Reet good. Fur coat and no knickers is one of the best phrases ever invented. As is up and down like a bride's nightie (which also links nicely with your outfit!) Tell the Phoenix he needs to come back to Sheffield for a visit and take you round all his old haunts! And then I can give you an arse squeeze for realsies!
You look particularly beautiful today, the silk nightie is exquisite and wow, feathery purple fabulousness!
And who can resist Johnny Cash and the sight of your frilly bloomers, all rolled up together in one post? Not me. I've go a reet lob on meself, duck. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ulla-Marie Nilsson said...

I have a perve at silk nighties! And you look very hot in yours!

Loo xx from Jumbles and Pompoms said...

An excellent post, Desiree, or as we say here in Landan Tahn, well sick. You are proper mental, Desiree but in the best possible way. Anyway, enough of that. The purple creation is gorgeous and I'm in love with those Johnny Cash earrings. The sight of you in your knickers is always a treat. xx

Marla said...

AMAZING! I want those earrings!!!

Bohemian vanity said...

Hello beauty ! Wow you look stunning ! Those earrings are amazing and that pink nighty is to die for ! Have a fabby day ! XX

OP SHOP MAMA said...

Phwoar I'd buy you a half innit!!

Love it!

Purple stole= must have item. Covet.
Johnny Cash earrings = inspired!
x

CityScape Skybaby said...

You've been on such a roll with your blogging lately Desiree and I've been doing such a bad job of commenting, though I've been reading and enjoying. As I'm in exile from the north of England which is home for me, it makes me feel all warm and glowy hearing these phrases from The Phoenix, though they say narky instead of mardy in my bit. I miss words like buggerlugs and calling your dinner your tea. You're looking gorgeous too, that cream slip looks like it was made just for you and you look like a total movie star in your pink nightie. And I love those Johnny Cash earrings, you always have the best earrings! xx

Silas Canning said...

By eck lass jobs a goodun I grew up in Doncaster South Yorkshire looking fabulous and I love your new curtains as well so your old man speaks my lingo bloody great small world or wot?
Keep up the good work
Luv n light Georgie xxxxx

Kitty said...

Love you and everything you do!!! But you already know that ;)

Sacramento Amate said...

How could I have missed this gorgeous post, ahhhhhhhhhhh.
I love and want everything you are wearing, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

XXXXXXXXXXXXxx

tralala said...

FEATHER CLOTHING FEATHER CLOTHING FEATHER CLOTHING

Can I add

- a face like a slapped arse (!)
- not being able to organise a piss-up in a brewery (hopeless)
- fair clempt (hungry/thirsty)
- I could ate a scabby dog (I'm hungry)
- one under t' pinny (the Mrs is preggers)
- not as green as he's cabbage looking (not as dim as he seems)
- tight as a duck's arse (miserly)
- thick as pig shite on a frosty night (dim)
- t'oreet marra (good morning)
- like maids water (weak tea)
- gerraway wi thi sen (bugger off)
- reet good (exceptional)

I won't get going on scouse .... (I'm a Scouser living in Lancashire - going from a place where everyone female is referred to as Queen to one where they are referred to as Flower was a bit of a come-down).

Emalina said...

What a GORGEOUS dress, and the love the headband, the earrings, not to mention the expressions! Very Betty Jackson/ Zandra Rhodes 30s bombshell!

Une Femme said...

Oh you are so beyond fabulous, it's off the charts!! And I'm going to heist "have a perve at some nice clobber" for my own. LOVE it.

Joni said...

Ooh La La, you succulent babe! Luscious as ever too. And look at that great lighting in your new room, it's a wonderful vibe in there for sure. You light it up even more!

MistressCatgirl said...

You look like you stepped out of the Roaring 20s. Love the Johnny Cash earrings. I've been wanting buy a brooch of him.

menopauselsupermodel said...

Well, this poor yankee hick has no clue what the hell y'all are saying but it sounds deliciously pervy!!
I ADORe the purple stole--you look like a movie goddess in the satin dress, headband and pearls.
Those Johnny Cash earrings are way cool and give me IDEAS!!!

Frannie Pantz said...

This post cracked me up! The Phoenix sounds like a stitch! I love that purple stole!

Annie said...

What a hoot! You're not sleazy, you're a right classy piece, innit.

Love the feather stole and the Johnny Cash earrings, and I can't wait to see more of Helga's goodies. Oh, and your patchwork curtain looks fabulous! xxx

thorne garnet said...

What an amazing feather thingy. It's crazy how warm those things are. Arse squeezes for everyone!

Ivy Black said...

How wonderful. I use 'shandy drinking Southern wankers' all the time even though I've been living in the south of England long enough to be one! 'Soft Southern tossers' is another one!
As I now live dahn sarf I say you are right lairy, proper mental and bloody gawjuss. The Welsh in me calls you 'well tidy.'
xxxx

Punk Glam Queen http://ideefixemon.blogspot.com said...

You look straight out of a 30's advert, stunning! My oldest friend in London is from Yorkshire, and another old friend too. They've both been in London for over 3 decades, yet they still sound like they came straight out of Yorkshire yesterday. I love all the different dialects and sayings -- ours aren't nearly as colourful and if they are I usually can't understand them, from my own country! (It works out okay, hubby lived all over and will translate US dialect for me, and I've friends all over the UK so I can translate for him when needed!) XXX

Alice Fraggle said...

I've been a lurker for a bit now, but I had to comment today to say that I LOVE your style! :)

Krista said...

Yummers!!!! I loved learning all kind of new words when I was visiting Vix. TARTS! CHAV! Don't be cheeky dear! Terri really did you right gurl and that fur is holy hell kinda good. I wanna groupe it and you!!!! I love your silky nightie and the one that Helga sent you! Those ear rings are all kinds of amazing! I love the colors of your head band too.
You are a tasty treat!!!!
XXOO

Rosalind said...

You look utterly fabulous - particularly in such a fetching shade of blue. Best post title I've come across in months. I want to include it in my general lexicon from now on.
Unfortunately, no exciting slang from where I live!
Would love to hear some more about your London days - these snippets just whet the appetite.

Miss Simmonds Says said...

more absolute gorgeousness and a bit of What The Butler Saw going on at the end - very saucy! I love the expression all fur coat... it's a bit like "all mouth and trousers" well in that they're both expressions and sound great. I can't get over your earrings I want them so much, but perhaps with morrissey instead
Big love xxx

liz said...

That purple stole is TO DIE FOR! Aaauggghhh I love it far more than the shabby purple boa I'm still holding onto that was shredded by Maggie as a puppy. :)

Meghan Edge said...

You are such a gorgeous creature! I love that stole and those earrings!

Forest City Fashionista said...

You sassy thing!! That purple fur stole is to die for and I LOOOVE the earrings that Mallory made for you. Thanks for supporting one of our local artists (and a single mother). The pink nightie is divine - your utter fabulousness is making me weak at the knees ;)

Aminta Paiz said...

Beautiful silk nightie :D !!! and your new headband is so cool... you are always so fun .. such a powerful and fantastic woman!! Check out my blog later... there is a surprise for you <3

Aminta

WendyB said...

You've got glamour and humor, a winning combination!

Terri said...

Oh, oh, oh, I knew that you had the chutzpah to carry off the boa! And this does not disappoint!! And the Johnny Cash earrings and nickers too boot. You are an eyeful!

Bohemian said...

Hilarious and Wonderful all at once! Loving your Friend's Slang! Of coarse the No Knickers part of the Blog Title caught my attention first... Loving the Ensemble and absolutely Lusting after your Gypsy Curtains!!! *Swoon*

Blessings from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian

Melanie said...

I'm a southerner through and through but shandy - bleurgh! Nasty!

Your stole is gorgeous! I can imagine you dancing the night away surrounded by flappers!

fashionoverfifty said...

jUST stopping by to say hi--hadnt seen you on instagram lately! So glad i did--the sayings are priceless. I'll try and remember some1
ps and you are gorgeous as eva!

Helga! said...

HOLY FRIGGING SHITBOX THIS IS LIK THE HOLY GRAIL OF FABULARSENESS!
Terri's feckin' done you proper and proud, my lovely!What an AMAZING bloody bit of fur!O, and that splendid stole as well!!!
You look right GLAMORARSE, like the Queen of Glamour!
I love that expression, all fur coat and no knickers!
a SUPERBLY SPLENDIFEROUS POST OF GLORY!
Love and Lustipops!
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

delia hornbook said...

Oh My goodness you are one stunning and beautiful lady which i already know but i have to say it again you look so stunning in that blue. That close up face photo of you just like a model you are. Love your posts i do always so full of glamour and fun. dee xx

Bethany said...

Love this look. Heyyyy sexy laday. hehe

Susan Partlan said...

Love it. Here's hoping you've had a little downtime, too. xoox

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